When I was a child, my grandfather asked me, "Mel,
between zero and nine, which number is the most powerful?"
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| Leadership by Mel Feller |
"You are mistaken," he told me. "It is true
that zero does not have any value on its own. But when you add something to it,
it becomes very valuable."
"What do you mean?" I asked.
"You must always remember that whoever you are, you are
nothing without other people. Most people, managers, leaders forget that once
they become powerful. They talk down to others, and forget their role in their
success. The bottom line is each of us is nothing without the contributions of
others. Nevertheless, when we add their efforts to our own, the result is very
powerful indeed. Nine becomes 90."
Like many older adults, my grandfather had wisdom and
knowledge that I did not fully understand at the time. As is often the case in
life, you do not appreciate things - or people until they are gone. My
grandfather passed away many years ago, but his advice still guides me every
day of my life. It seems even more prescient now that I have children of my
own.
My grandfather's point was that, without others, our lives
have little meaning, and our dreams and goals will go unfulfilled. If we want
to move forward, we need others to help us get there to move us from zero to a
bigger number. When we understand, respect, and include others in our lives, we
become so much more! My grandfather's lesson was a simple one, but it continues
to have a profound effect on me.
If you are having trouble resolving a challenge at work, you
will never move past zero unless and until you reach out to others. Each of us
needs someone to help us achieve our dreams and goals at work, home, and in our
communities.
Empathy entails understanding the feelings, thoughts, or
attitudes of someone else putting yourself in their shoes. Without empathy, you
will never move past zero. Empathy means understanding that the decisions you
make every single day affect not just you when you understand that, you move
from "me" to "we." In addition, when you move from
"me" to "we" you open yourself up to a much more fulfilling
life. You appreciate that you are a small speck in a very large ocean,
regardless of your rung on the corporate - or any other - ladder. Once you
understand that, you will find yourself being kinder towards others. Moreover,
when you are kinder, empathetic and you can accomplish so much more!
If you are a leader in an organization, how you treat your
team, suppliers, and clients is the difference between remaining at zero and
becoming truly successful. The same is true if you are an elected official without
your constituents, you are nothing. As a parent, your children make your family
whole. The sum is so much greater than the individual parts.
My grandfather taught me that success depends on others whether
you are the leader of the free world, a stay-at-home parent, or a Girl Scout
leader, you can't do it alone.
Leading cannot always be measured by specific return on
investment any more than long-term profitability can be measured by focusing
solely on quarterly returns. However, inspiring employees, family members, and
even your neighbors will make a difference. I make my living helping some of
the world's best-known brands improve their processes, and I can assure you
that not everything can be measured quantitatively. However, I can guarantee
showing empathy towards others will always pay off.
Mel Feller Websites
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